This blog is dedicated to my little girl Ellie Marie. She was stillborn at 37 weeks and 3 days of pregnancy. I am hoping that this blog will help me and others who have to go through this grieving and healing process.

Monday, June 27, 2011

Trinady

Written Sunday June 19th at 12:50 pm

We found out last night that our friend's baby died at 3 months old. Just like with you they had no clue anything was wrong. The dad went to check on her in the morning and she was cold. They know of our loss and imagine that you two are together in heaven comforting each other. We cried with the grandma who is our next door neighbor. We are planning on going to visit them today after church. Dad made a comment that they must really need missionaries up in heaven right now.
In a way I do feel stronger because of what they are going through. I know it's a cliche to say this but I believe it more and more. God does work in mysterious ways. I don't pretend to understand his methods and reasonings.
I was having a particularly bad moment the other night where I was crying and mad at God. I was telling your dad that I know God didn't do this to us but he could have prevented it. He must have had some reason for allowing this to happen to us because we don't deserve it. The moment passed and i'm not mad at God anymore. I know he must have his reasons and I may never fully know those reasons. But I do trust him and I have faith that we will be able to be with you again and we will be blessed with other children.
I love you so much ellie girl. I can't wait to meet you again. Watch over us and keep reminding us to be good so we can be together eternally.
love you baby girl.

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