This blog is dedicated to my little girl Ellie Marie. She was stillborn at 37 weeks and 3 days of pregnancy. I am hoping that this blog will help me and others who have to go through this grieving and healing process.

Monday, December 5, 2011

Gratefulness

Ellie,
Today dad and I were reading the 1st presidency message in the Ensign. The topic was about being grateful. We decided that this was perfect for us this month because we want to focus on all the things we do have instead of what we don't have. After the message there was an activity for the youth to do. I though this would be a good activity for me to do this month.
The challenge is to write 100 things that you are grateful for. They break it down in to 10 categories to make it easier. Each day i'm going to write about one of those categories and when I run out of categories i'll make up my own.
So today i'm starting with the category physical abilities:
1. I am grateful that I can carry children. This is an amazing blessing for women and I realize that some women do not have this ability or have lost it. It took us so long to get pregnant with you I was worried I wasn't able to, but now I know I can.
2. I am grateful that I can walk.
3. I am grateful that I can see.
4. I am grateful that I can hear.
5. I am grateful that I can sing.
6. I am grateful that I can taste. I love to eat.
7. I am grateful that I don't have any lifelong diseases.
8. I am grateful that I don't have any physical deformities (as long as you don't count my puny pinkie toenails).
9. I am grateful for the ability to heal quickly. My body went through a lot when you were born and that recovery process was pretty rough but I am grateful that it went well. I have a pretty nasty scar but I am healed and pretty much back to normal other than that.
10. I am grateful for the ability to cry. Would that be considered a physical ability? I have found crying to be very therapeutic. Sometimes I feel much better after I let those tears out.

I love you baby girl.
Good night.

2 comments:

  1. I was searching for wooden letters for my daughters bedroom, she's 6 and her name is Ellie. I came across your blog and have read only a few posts and knew I had to write to you...I'm so sorry you lost your little girl. I can't even imagine being without mine and I can't begin to understand how you feel. Your little one was...IS so beautiful. You're still a mummy, albeit one with empty arms. Someday you'll be blessed with another baby, a gift from your Angel Ellie. I'm sat with tears running down my face, thinking about losing my own Ellie and wondering how I would feel, but mostly, my tears are for you and your husband. You are so strong to even be able to talk so openly about your loss and I hope that you find peace some day. I'm not religious, but tonight as I tuck my Ellie into bed I'll think of you xxx

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thank you for your kind words Cat. Give your Ellie and extra squeeze for me every time you tuck her in.

    ReplyDelete